UK OFF TOPIC THREAD ----------------------

512 tea are you in the KT's too?

 

off to a fancy dress party tonight, going as well.... just check it out

 

excerpt from my favourate scene:

Royal Albert hall? .... Royal Albert Hall?... wait F*ck off a minute... Royal Albert Hall?


Can't for the life of me understand why its funny, but it is.

 

Dear Comrade Stephen Paynter M8,

Indeed I am. My mother is a BL which will totally fox you! A clue is 'Strathmore.'

For those of whom may be concerned about this matter and to alleviate any more excommunications of my spirit from this Forum I can advise that KT is 'Knight Templar.' Indeed, my American contingent (Jimbo) has recently Posted upon this Forum and he too is a KT and possesses a 512 Tea Are of which he removes the engine himself, changes the cam belts and god knows what else. All this is performed whilst Toeknee Hopskins our illustrious 'Moderator' is stuffing himself with pies in Russell's Cafe. For myself, I, and as stated upon my return from Monaco, now have official residency within the Principality and all of which has been confirmed by the UK Inland Revenue. I now pay no tax whatsoever and am now searching for an F40 or a 550 Barchetta to take out there. I shall place a huge banner emblazoned with 512 TEA ARE - TEA ARSE LIVES HERE right across the balcony of my apartment so that when the Monaco Grand Pricks is filmed the whole world will see it - along with Steve and his son Russell (from the Cafe) and myself and Jimbo, plus Ray 360M who will be sat there drinking champagne and popping the corks at Schumacker as he drives by.

I still have no idea why I was banned. I behaved just the same at Eton and had no trouble there.

 

yes I am very intrigued now m8?

 

Dear Comrade and Brother Stephen Paynter M8,

Regrettably I can provide no further clues.

With kind regards,

512 Tea Arse

 

no probs i understarnd fully will do some research with the brethren and get back to you

 

Dear Comrade Toeknee M8,

Indeed, veiled in allegory as inevitably it must.

With kind regards,

512 Tea Are - Tear Arse

 

This ****e is Proper Bo!!!! I telll Thee!! ,,,Me Kes can do betta!!!

 

Steve Nice One Mate I tell Thee!!

 

Dear Comrade 360CS,

Let us hope that an accident does not befall you whilst in Florida lest you fall within the honourable care of the gentleman doctor and find that your words should be better eaten - or are they even too bitter for your own taste?

With kind regards,

512 Tea Are - Tear Arse

 

Whats this mumbo jumbo Graham!!!!!! What you on m8?? I think youve eaten several Oxford Dictionaries???

Dont worry about me G, I wont be the one having any accidents...



Kindest Regards

 

Dear Comrade 360CS,

You answered your own question M8!

One can never be certain about accidents - that is why they are such. For example, if you drive the Stradale too fast the PVC stripes may 'accidentally' blow away.

With kind regards,

512 Tea Are - Tear Arse

 

Dear 512Tea Are


Ill be real carefull then, Im sure the Synthetic Resin used to firmly secure the said items will prove to be of great performance while travelling at such high speeds.

Regards


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That's Bowes-Lyon by the way

 

Steve it all Mumbo Jumbo to me

 

hey joe why are you not in the cafe with all the other big kids you can have one free drink then you have to pay although money might be tight at your end after paying £3500 for a white stripe

 

Steve.


....NEWS FLASH!!......i NEVER. so its Drinks all round

 

Dear Comrade 360CS,

Should you decide to drive the Stradale fast anywhere within the New Forest please will you be so kind as to give me prior warning - so that I may have sufficent time to place the shutters over my windows to reduce the potential of breakage from the exhaust resonance!

With kind regards,
512 Tea Are - Tear Arse

 

It keeps our resident Walter Mitty amused if nothing else.

 

No problem Sir!!!

However the resonance can only be fatal while "LOW LEVEL DRIVING" I shall ensure im at a good altitude whilst passing the New Forest area.

;-0
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Dear Comrade 360CS,

Apparently Steve has a litigation claim upon him at 'The Cafe' due to the stripes twisting around a young lady's ankles and causing her to slip up - in doing so, she fell upon his lap and suffered a slipadicktome.