I have to disagree with your statement, "the paddle shifts were...not good on the 575". Sure they don't snap into place, but if you know how to use them (manually) they are still faster on a twisty road than a gated 550. Try driving a 575. They are such a great car and a real bargain today. One of the best looking Ferraris' ever designed too. Good review on the two cars.
Besides, how fast can you go. I'd rather have the extra seconds to enjoy the noise and power. The 812 is just too fast. And I have $300,000+ more in my pocket.
Indeed the F1-gearbox was gradually improved over time, from the 355 to the 599 - each iteration was better than the previous one. The 575's was the penultimate version (basically aligned with the 360 CS), so while not as good as the 599's it was already very good - regarding speed of gearchange, I suspect actually even the 355 F1 gearbox, while feeling really bad, is still faster than a manual: the perception is different when one just pulls a paddle compared to declutching, moving a gearstick, re-engaging clutch. When one does the things one does not wait for them to happen, which was the case with the early F1-gearbox: pull the paddle, and then feel the time for all the process to complete... Of course the dual clutch is on a different level, it's not just another step of development of the same system.
Affirmative, just one row of holes over. Ferrari actually did this on the 575M F1s midway through production. Not likely you would do that on someone else's 550, though.